'Past' and 'Present' is still understandable, but to have a 'Future' section on a personal site that doesn't focus on futuristic sci-fi stories sounds a bit weird. That is why I feel, I should at least make an attempt to explain this new absurd anomaly in my nature. It's quite understandable if you cannot relate with it.
In order to give you a glimpse of what transpired within, that led to this stage, I would like to cite an example of 'Prisoner'.
There are three stages in a life of a 'Prisoner'.
First - This is the initial stage when the prisoner has been just convicted and transferred to a high-security prison. It's been drilled into the prisoner's mind that escape is not a possibility and the prisoner somehow comes to believe that it is true. Yet, the fact that he is trapped fuels his desire for freedom, which results in hatred towards the place. He stays detached from his surrounding wondering why in the first place, he landed up there.
Since he has nothing else to do, he keeps thinking what brought him to the dreaded place. He is constantly leaving in those past moments that probably he would have changed if he had known the consequences beforehand. This is the "Past" phase of his life.
Second - This is the stage that follows the struggle phase. After his futile battle with the 'Reality', the prisoner finally gives in. This helps him to settle in the prison. Gradually, he feels comfortable with the surrounding and the daily happenings. He socializes and feels connected with the others around him. His comfort takes his thought away from the past moments. He is now able to experience and enjoy the present moment. This is the "Present" phase of his life.
Third - This is the final phase of the prisoner's life. Having served his time well, the prisoner is informed that he will soon be released. The joy of freedom shatters the feeling of comfort in the prisoner. He soon forgets how used to, he had become to the place. His anticipation of the Release Day makes him desperately impatient. He no longer feels attached to his surroundings. Life has come full circle for him. The same prison that felt like home till a while ago now appears to be an alien territory. Even the friends he had made seem like strangers. He can no longer relate to anyone around him. He no longer feels belonged and it doesn't bother him a bit.
All his thoughts are glued to the one moment that would set him free; the moment that is yet to arrive. This is the "Future" phase of his life.
June 13, 2009
Whether you call this life - a dream or a reality, you are trapped in it!